Thursday, August 9, 2012

The love of my family!


I suffer from migraines I'm pretty sure we all suffer from something in life. As I lay here in my bed all I can think about is my loved ones. My sisters and brothers most of all and how much I miss them. Then I ask myself "Do I really have to miss them?"  No I don't. We all make excuses for ourselves in life and the main one that we all love to use so much is "I am so busy!" It's bull shit!  
I had a cousin who I adored so much and we always talked about getting together to sing a song, doing lunch and hanging out and one day she was helping her son with his homework and she just collapse. Now she is no longer here. We are not promised tomorrow. looking back at that now I am learning we have to live for today like it is our last. 
Don't go to bed mad. Make up with your loved one before going to sleep at night it will be silly other wise. I learn happiness is a temporary state of mind well so is anger. So let it go! It's not worth it. We should be loving one another unconditionally and leaving the judging to only self judgement let's be honest the only ones who judge here is we. We only judge ourselves. Love your loved ones as they are when they are ready for change just be there for support and encourage and give them strength for each step they take. That is what you are they for. To love!  
The only time when a personal opinion should be given is when it is begged for. When someone ask me for mine and I still don't feel comfort I still take a step back and say " This is not my place to step for this is your path and you have to figure it out what ever your choice may be I will be here if it is wrong and you fall I will be here to help you up and tell you to try again it you are happy with your choice I will encourage you to move forward!" 
I want to be there for my sister's. I want those priceless moments at any cost! I wanna see my nieces and nephews grow and teach me lessons in return. I want to be surrounded by the love of my family! I miss them so! 
Thank you for reading ... Namaste.....

Wednesday, August 8, 2012

Since my 3rd Reiki Attunement!!!

I have gone through a lot of changes since my 3rd Reiki Attunement. During my Attunement the Masters before me showed me their faces and showed me ancient statues I didn't mind I love art then I saw something that made my heart light up. I saw a vision of my son wrapped in a baby blanket as a newborn and then again as a infant in a baby walkers following me around with a smile on his face with a bright aura about him. I knew then I was going to be okay, and I thanked my God and Goddess for their blessing.

I feel like my attunement gave me a better understanding now and I have more patience about what my mentor well I refer to this person as my mentor when she always told me " They are not me they don't know what I know!" I am not angry anymore. The show must go on, the people in my life is only Human.

I understand now a part of that life I shared with my Wusband is still healing as well and that part of me was vulnerable. I am embracing that vulnerable part of me and telling myself I a safe now and he can not hurt me anymore. I am beautiful, I am not damaged I am still strong, my heart still beats and is capable of love for another day.

It's like the tree of life! Some limbs have to be cut so new branches can grow!

I am growing, I am changing because I choose to, because I want too.

The Asshat I am married too will never come to term of understanding this when you don't co-exist with your being you only know how to be selfish and hurt all that care about you.

I wish him wish and the Universe will take care of him. He married me for all the wrong reasons. I understand this is 2012 but when do we lose sight of ourselves and lose or morals we was raised with?

Never in this life time and any other.

Thank you for reading.... Namaste....