Sunday, December 30, 2012

Just a vision or something more

The other day I was siting at my desk at Corporate America I got the sensation to go home to go home where it all started. To now where there the suffering. I have an amazing gift called laying on hands. My hands heat up and my body will sometimes heat up as well when something or someones is ill or needs to be healed, however I took it as confirmation as to what I was getting from my vision I was having at my desk at work.

My vision was to go back to what they call The Mother Land, Africa! I must go back to heal and teach others the amazing practice to heal as well. I want to place healing centers around the world so other people can become attune and become teachers and teach others to heal. There is a protocol call that comes with this practice to make sure the person have the right intention I want to work with the people with the pure of hearts with no egos.

Was it just a vision? I sure hope it was something more, I want to make it happen.

Monday, October 15, 2012

Our Purpose......

Everyone has a purpose in life whether they believe it or not, even if it seems so small or if you get overwhelm by how big it seems and you don't know where to begin to start. It doesn't matter as long as you start and begin somewhere, and don't be afraid to ask for help because the people that are surround around you that has put up with your bullshit that has been there through thick and thin has been put there for a reason. Not to judge but to love you unconditionally and to live this journey with you till the end! So just open your arms wide for an warm embrace and don't stay angry long over something small and petty. We our not always promise tomorrow so just live for today with love and kindness!

Thank you for reading.....

Thursday, September 27, 2012

I have been to hell but I return to Love!!!

I have been M.I.A. for a moment going through my ordeals of torments with my family and learning to truth of my past. I am finding out and learning how to stand in my own space!!!

If this is what I need to do to learn who I am so be it. Bring on the heart ache. I have learn and meet beautiful people in the processing, caring people and the ones who was giving to me at birth I have learn are poison to me and had to learn and find out the hard I have to let go and leave these people be. Going through a divorce isn't always easy as well having to find out who you are without this person in your life can also be exciting as well, but doing it alone is hard.

I am not going to lie. I have cried so many nights and have had so many divine conversions with God and this is when I realize how special I am. Is when I can hear God respond to me. It warms my heart my body and my spirit. I am gifted. I am a leader. I am a Shepard. I am a Light Worker. I am and I will heal.

God wouldn't get me challenges that he knew I wouldn't be able to succeed. I have be to able to get through this and get through it with dignity and grace. After all I have been through I could be bitter, I could be angry but I am not. Instead I am grateful, I am loving, I am caring, I will continue to practice Metta ever where I go. Metta means Kindness in Sanskrit.

Below is a link of the Metta Sutra of the Budha's words of Kindness of you are interested in reading :

My life is not easy as long as I have the people that is still within it that are selfish, mean and ugly it will continue to be as it is. I realize today as much as I love for my own health I have to let them go. I have had a relationship with myself for 33 years and out of the 33 years I have made great sacrifices now it is time for me to do for myself.

In this year I have learn to fall in love with myself and love others more. Cry and not be a shame for what I am crying for and what I am feeling. I have learned to co- exist with myself as a human- being and loving every minute of it!

I have been to my personal hell but I have returned to Love!!!
Thank you for reading ... Namaste....

Thursday, August 9, 2012

The love of my family!

I suffer from migraines I'm pretty sure we all suffer from something in life. As I lay here in my bed all I can think about is my loved ones. My sisters and brothers most of all and how much I miss them. Then I ask myself "Do I really have to miss them?"  No I don't. We all make excuses for ourselves in life and the main one that we all love to use so much is "I am so busy!" It's bull shit!  
I had a cousin who I adored so much and we always talked about getting together to sing a song, doing lunch and hanging out and one day she was helping her son with his homework and she just collapse. Now she is no longer here. We are not promised tomorrow. looking back at that now I am learning we have to live for today like it is our last. 
Don't go to bed mad. Make up with your loved one before going to sleep at night it will be silly other wise. I learn happiness is a temporary state of mind well so is anger. So let it go! It's not worth it. We should be loving one another unconditionally and leaving the judging to only self judgement let's be honest the only ones who judge here is we. We only judge ourselves. Love your loved ones as they are when they are ready for change just be there for support and encourage and give them strength for each step they take. That is what you are they for. To love!  
The only time when a personal opinion should be given is when it is begged for. When someone ask me for mine and I still don't feel comfort I still take a step back and say " This is not my place to step for this is your path and you have to figure it out what ever your choice may be I will be here if it is wrong and you fall I will be here to help you up and tell you to try again it you are happy with your choice I will encourage you to move forward!" 
I want to be there for my sister's. I want those priceless moments at any cost! I wanna see my nieces and nephews grow and teach me lessons in return. I want to be surrounded by the love of my family! I miss them so! 
Thank you for reading ... Namaste.....

Wednesday, August 8, 2012

Since my 3rd Reiki Attunement!!!

I have gone through a lot of changes since my 3rd Reiki Attunement. During my Attunement the Masters before me showed me their faces and showed me ancient statues I didn't mind I love art then I saw something that made my heart light up. I saw a vision of my son wrapped in a baby blanket as a newborn and then again as a infant in a baby walkers following me around with a smile on his face with a bright aura about him. I knew then I was going to be okay, and I thanked my God and Goddess for their blessing.

I feel like my attunement gave me a better understanding now and I have more patience about what my mentor well I refer to this person as my mentor when she always told me " They are not me they don't know what I know!" I am not angry anymore. The show must go on, the people in my life is only Human.

I understand now a part of that life I shared with my Wusband is still healing as well and that part of me was vulnerable. I am embracing that vulnerable part of me and telling myself I a safe now and he can not hurt me anymore. I am beautiful, I am not damaged I am still strong, my heart still beats and is capable of love for another day.

It's like the tree of life! Some limbs have to be cut so new branches can grow!

I am growing, I am changing because I choose to, because I want too.

The Asshat I am married too will never come to term of understanding this when you don't co-exist with your being you only know how to be selfish and hurt all that care about you.

I wish him wish and the Universe will take care of him. He married me for all the wrong reasons. I understand this is 2012 but when do we lose sight of ourselves and lose or morals we was raised with?

Never in this life time and any other.

Thank you for reading.... Namaste....

Monday, July 23, 2012

My Birthday Weekend of Reflection

my birthday just pasted on July 21st. I went to go get my Reiki III Attunement  and I am completely excited and ready for my future, however the realization of where I still sit was what had broken my heart. I spent my birthday alone. 

I have come to realize I love my family to death however I need to step back and let them be. I do and give so much and I do get a Thank You. I don't asked for much however a Thank You would be nice. Appreciation ....

I would just like a little appreciation. My life is about to change so fast and I have accepted the thought of that as scary as it sounds. I am ready to embrace this change with open arms and an open heart and I knew as soon I saw the vision of my beautiful baby boy everything was going to be okay! 

I will be given the chance to have a family of my own! My all is not in vain. I assumed because I spent my life taking care of other people and My Mother depends on me so much to the point I feel like I can't breath I will never have the experience of raising my own family. Change is not always scary it is a part of the growth of life! Just be open and ready and see what the Universe brings to you door! 

Thank you for reading....

Sunday, July 15, 2012

What a day! When spirits pick up the phone. SMH

All I ever wanted was to become a Yoga Teacher and open my own studio however things don't always go in the order and way as we wish. My calling as a Energy Healer is strong and I am gifted but I just don't want to put a label on it. The whole transaction of becoming a Psychic-Medium has not been so cheerful however life throws challenges and you have to be patient and graceful when you are dealing with them, or you will still lose control of yourself.

Like today I have the Police show up to my door because someone is calling and hanging on the 911 line and no one is picking up the phone to call them. When the Police Officer left my sister Shelley and I looked at each other and started laughing only because we knew it was spirit.

Spirit has been turning my phone on after I turn it off and setting alarm clocks at odd times through out the day. Even if I turn the alarm on off setting it will be set back to on. I have had this child spirit she is about 7 or 8 years old and don't like being ignore. She even drain the battery out of my smoke detector after I replaced it. Ugh so annoying. So if this child don't stop I don't know if the Police Department will send us a bill or not for no one calling them.

Other then getting no sleep at night and being hazed by a child spirit I roll my eyes everything someone say "It must be awesome to have that power!" Power it is just a part of who I am. I am Me at the end of the day just like I am Me when I first wake up.

Thank you for reading ....

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Live Life by Listening to your Spirit

There are some things that are even out of my understanding and scare the hell out of me, and others that just break my heart. I live my life as the day come, I love with no doubt, and live to not exist. I know something is changing inside me. I can feel it shifting, and I can't even explain but I won't deny it however I will try to understand it. That is just how I am. I feel it isn't my place to pass judgement on another person no matter how old my families money is, or what social status my sister or family have at his or her church. 
If you belong to a religious background I say good for you. I believe religion is good for some people. I believe in God and have a beautiful relationship with my Heavenly Father my place of worship is where I see fit, wherever I kneel and pray. Trust me I did it a lot especially as being a Energy Healer. I pray before and after I lay my hands on someone. When I wake up before I go to bed, silent ones from friends and loved ones, again when I see accidents on the side of the roads, before I do my absentee healing at night and before I go to sleep at night for any who don't know how to pray for themselves.
All I pray for is the Strength and Courage to show others and to let me lead by example to inspire the lives I touch with my Heavenly Father's Loving energy. My Great-Grand Mother raised me as a Golden Child sometimes I think they made a mistake. Other times I have to keep my eyes forward and keep moving and remember God gave his children a gift, and that was the path they choose, and I will continue to keep walking mine with our without the people I loved for so long who I called my family and friends. My spirit was given a job before I was born into this existence.
My mentor helped me realize as well I'm not like other Psychic's. I am not here to make a believer out of anyone. I am here to relieve your pain and suffering. People will believe what they want to believe either if they was conditioned by a group setting, or if that is what they was taught. I was raised as I am to listen to my heart first that is how the great Divine speaks to me. The heart is the one place the devil can't get its hands on and can not be manipulated. So when I feel lost to listen to my heart and God will speak to me. 
I have never been lost I can honestly say because I have never stopped listening. I usually get in trouble when I make decision with my mind instead of following my intuition. God speaks to us all. Some of us just don't know how to listen. Will we ever get to that place again where are hearts(spirit) lead the way? 

Sunday, May 13, 2012

I'm Developing into a Psychic-Medium

Okay so I started this blog with the intention to show people or the world, Psychic-Intuitive's aren't just people who sit in metaphysics shop sitting behind the table with Crystal Balls. I actually have a Amethyst Sphere Ball! lol

I am a born psychic- intuitive the only thing that means is I have extra senses that I wish I sometimes wish I didn't have. As I child I went through the spirit stage that adults call my imaginary friends, and when I will tell people things as a child they would never know how I would know. The spirits do talk! As a teenager I went through the Empathic stage it's when you can pick up someone else's emotions and feelings like it is your own and I was already a moody teen. In my early 20's I went through my Medical Intuitive stage which was awesome because it help me with nursing and when I was a vet tech. 

When I reach my late 20's my Empathic abilities came back to hunt me because I started to pick up the physical pain like it was my own. Yes Ouch! Now I am 32 years old suffering from headaches for the pass 8 months just finding out it's energy because spirit is trying to communicate with me. Yes I am developing or growing into a Psychic-Medium. Out of all the things that can happen I am developing into a Psychic-Medium.

When I first found out I did fall into a little depression, I'm not going to lie I don't want it. I was at my strove cooking dinner and when I turned around a woman was leaning against the entry way counter just watching me like she was bored. When she made eye contact she realize I can see her and straighten up a little. I blinked and then she was gone, but I can sense she was still there. Now here and there I am seeing people around my apartment popping in and out. I guess when my eyes try to make since of what it is seeing they disappear. So I am growing unto a Psychic- Medium or what actually I will eventually have every Psychic Gift in the book! Fun!! I'm keep you posted! 

Sunday, April 22, 2012

Celebrate Everyday

Hello everybody and Happy Earth Day !!! I am supposed to say I am a born psychic - intuitive and I have a deep connection with the Earth however that is bull shit. I am not a born psychic - intuitive and I don't have a deep connection with the Earth. I'm an reincarnated spirit and an energy within the human body that is deeply connection to everyone and everything that posses energy that is living included the Earth which is an energy within itself. I'm just tired of the labels. 
I want to take the time out and remind everyone on Earth Day on our human birth place to let celebrate everyday to respect where we come from. Earth! 
I don't watch the news or read the news papers I'm too empathic if there the a disaster I am pulled out of my body and I am there in spirit to heal, and I see other in spirit form like myself confused but in impulse knows what to do. Sounds interesting? I have been getting pulled out of my shell started when I was 9 when a very mean person released nerve gas agent on innocent men, women, and children, which was sad and heart breaking because only the children could see us. 
It doesn't matter what color our skin is, or what language we speak, in on life time or another you was may have been that same skin tone or spoke that same language. At the end we are all Spirit and we are all born as Humans on the same place, Earth. So let  Celebrate Everyday the Union of Brother and Sisterhood of our birthplace Earth! 

Live life as intended!

We use to sing a song called " The one who holds our hand."  Meaning not to worry about tomorrow just live your life day by day as long as you walk your path the is laid out before you, God will walk it with you holding your hand. We are never alone and it's time we really start believing that. 
It time we stop playing victim and stop crying "Why me ?" and instead say Thank you! give thanks and show gratitude for being giving another shitty day and smile through it. Like my Grandma always say " You never know!" and she is right you never know what God has planed for you. God made the date when you took your first breath and God can make the date when the last breath will be taken away. So was it really worth it? Was that tit for that really worth it? 
We go on in our lives pointing finger playing the blame play and we never own up to our part because our shit don't sink. Turn the finger and ask yourself how did it get to this? Is the answer, because you lied to yourself and turned a blind eye and decided to live in denial then the situation you are in is just as much as your fault you chose to ignore there was a problem until it was to late to fix it. Now that glass is spilling over. 
The whole purpose of this post is to just say, stop the BS, Go live life and live in and be honest with yourself and you will find it can be easy to be honest with other people when you start with yourself. Even as a Psychic- Intuitive I don't see and know everything but I know to always follow and listen to my heart that's where Gods speaks to me and that on thing that will never deceive me . 
Thank you for reading 

Monday, March 26, 2012

Love with an Open Heart!!!!

Hello and good fortune to you all! Today is just today it can be like no other if you will like it to be like no other day. 

We choose the setting tone of what our is like and so forth. Someone could be having a bad day and could lash out at you and try to make it negative or it could just be a cry for help. Just exactly what is that person reason saying. Empathize with that person. Open your arms show them your heart and give them a hug, and whisper in their ear "Everything will be alright!" 

At that moment that person could embrace back and release resentment, anger, pain, suffering, sadness, and etc...  There is a possibility you may have been that person's first hug since the new year or a long time in 6 months. We as human beings need personal contact. It's how we show God's love within one another. 

With today's society we have been taught showing affection can be frowned upon and is an act of weakness. It is actually apart of are DNA code and something we should focus on bringing back. It is one of the reason why we as human beings are so disconnected no only from each other but also from ourselves. 

How many people do you actually know that refer to them-self as Human or someone who co-exist with them-self as a Human-Being (Vessel & Spirit)? 

Emotions can say a lot about a person. Some people can tend to take it personal and make it " It's the all about me show!" or you can have a care and listen with your heart and open it with your arms  and just welcome a friend in and let God do the rest. Trust me it's the best feeling in the world. 

Love with an open heart! 

Sunday, March 18, 2012

Living in Blindness

In my life and in my world I have learn you are only as blind as you wanna be. It doesn't matter how intuitive you are, you make the decision if you want to see or not.

In today's day of age we have so many distraction. We are physically in the same room with one another but mentally we are all disconnected we either separate ourselves or grow apart. I was so use to the treatment for so long in my mind I thought it was normal when it was going on in my marriage.

Since I was a child my own Mother was Emotionally Unavailable. She chose to live in a world of the reality of the the television set instead of being evolved in my world of my up bringing. So I thought it was normal when it was happening in my own marriage.

When I stopped taking to prescription pills that blocked some of my abilities. It was like a veil being lifted. I was able to see clearer, brighter, thoughts of my spirit guides, emotions and feelings of other people. The way my husband felt about me. He didn't like, he didn't love me, he didn't want me.

Getting he to confirm it now was the trick. Being a Psychic you always know but you always need confirmation otherwise you will feel like you are going mad.

I have know this about my husband since December. I just didn't know how far back the lies when until February of 2012, and that was what hurt the most. I was able to get over him pretty quickly only because I always knew. He only stopped touching me during the Summer of 2011.

Why does it still pain me so much. Because I was Emotionally Abused my entire life and it all started with my Mother and I never knew it.

I hope now I can only spread awareness to Emotional Abuse. People do it and not even realize it. They are so caught up in their Lap top, Cell phone, video games and etc to notice they are neglecting their loved ones and they are living in isolation. No one can love in isolation. It's not possible there isn't a chance for growth as Human- beings.

Thank you for reading

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Divorce, Realization, Awaking for Me

         Being  a Psychic I should have saw it coming right? My marriage coming to an end. The years of emotional abuse. I should of saw that my husband wasn't sexually attractive to me any more. The biggest low blow I should of saw that he didn't love me, and as he said he never did love me. Ouch!!!
           I am human just like the next the person. Yes? I was just made a little different. For once in my life I just wanted some normalcy, and my husband gave me that, I guess everything isn't what it looks like. In order to get my normalcy I alter myself by taking a prescription drug called Lithium Carbonate ER which did alter my psychic abilities and made me blind so I couldn't see the truth.

           So the truth in it all I did this to myself. There was nothing wrong with me the how I was before the medication. Why I did it? I wish I could take it all back. Will I do it again. Never. As I sit here heart broken alone sharing my story about my path of stupidity. I also look for my new path of the door that just opened for my for I must find a way to move on to heal.

            My husband is  a lot at fault as well he married me and he never loved me. and we have been married for 2 and a half years now. I wanted to be loved unconditionally and have a family, but instead I had a marriage that wasn't included with a loving husband which makes my marriage a lie.
Which is only half the story. If I am a business deal should I have a contract or a negotiation? An Irish man who marriages an American girl who had other intention with no permanent Visa to stay in the U.S. he can go back where he came from. We have enough dogs here in the states to go around.
He can go back to Ireland and go live with his Mamma if all I care. Fuck what he is going through.

This little born Psychic- Intuitive woman is taking her power back and she is bring hell with her.

Learn from my mistake. Love and embrace who you are God made you that way for a reason.
I am 100% me again, I have a foot in both realities and I wouldn't have it any other way. I just don't get to sleep the way how I use too anymore, but my path is bright and I'm smiling and I have a whole lot of dancing to do!

Thank you for reading